#me: who the fuck is making asmr on my lawn and what is the title of this video and do i need to contact authorities

[fictional-worlds-are-exquisite]

walked outside to see if my cat wanted to come in for the night and literally all i hear is crunching

just some fucking crunching LOUDLY coming from the direction where my cat is hunched over

so i walk over to this crunchy bitch like the fuck are you eating and WHY i know your ass ate your fill out of your food bowl an hour ago you cannot already be hungry again so what is THIS

and i get there and she’s refusing to let me see what tf she has. she’s too busy going crunch crunch crunch sucking this bad boy up like a lego noodle

well i managed to make out a tiny tail so i’m guessing she got a skink but damn. how many bones that bad boy got,,, why so crunchy,,, and how the fuck did slow ass sloth cat over here manage to CATCH one

maybe it was a bug. maybe it was a mouse she’d been eating her way through for the last hour. but the tail seemed awfully lizard-ish. idk man. i left her to her tiny bastard lethal chiropractor ways on some unknown creature